he texted "u up?" at 2am. you:
what's your read receipt policy?
someone asks if you're seeing anyone.
your last relationship status update would be:
pick a breakup song mood:
you're #N3ELSHITAN
you don't vent. you announce.
you're IM NOT FLIRTING (WITH YOU)
you are, in fact, flirting.
you're SITUATIONSHIP OF THE YEAR
congratulations on the award nobody wanted.